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Unobtainium 1: Kate on a Hot Tin Roof Page 8


  Kate swung into a rest position, paused briefly, nodded once, and turned to bounce off towards the rear door of the house. Antonia and Little heaved concurrent sighs.

  ‘Your tea will get cold, ma’am,’ Little said.

  ‘That was worth cold tea.’

  London Zoo, Regents Park, 7th June.

  The insect house had been vaguely discomforting, and Kate had not liked the reptiles too much. The monkeys were too human, and yet not human enough. The elephants giving rides to the public made her a little sad, and the penguins made her laugh.

  But the tigers… She could have watched the tigers for hours. And the big male watched her as well. He prowled around the bars, vanishing into the undergrowth of the cage occasionally, only to reappear with his eyes on Kate. She could feel him sizing her up, determining how much of a threat she was even though thick iron separated them, but there was something else. Mister Thomas’s ministrations had eased her tensions considerably, but she was still in oestrus and he knew it; he knew she was receptive, and there was attraction, but he also knew she would put up a fight even if he were able to approach her. She was not, quite, tiger. She was like a tiger, but not. It perplexed him almost as much as it did Kate.

  ‘It’s sad, in a way,’ Antonia said as she stood beside Kate, watching the animal watch her friend.

  ‘What is?’

  ‘To see such a beast held within bars. There are good reasons for it. Good scientific reasons. And the way tigers are hunted in India I’ll wager the only ones left in a few decades will be the ones in captivity, but it’s still sad to see the undisputed king of his realm brought so low. He seems to like you.’

  ‘He’s not sure what I am. I am unable to tell him that I am unsure of that myself. He is… interested in me.’

  ‘I think we all are.’

  ‘No, I mean…’ She leaned a little closer to Antonia and lowered her voice. ‘I am not entirely free of that animal urge, though it has greatly abated. I believe I am giving off signals of some sort which he is sensing. I assume they are subtle and men cannot detect them, but he can.’

  ‘His senses are far superior to those of most men,’ Antonia agreed, ‘but I would not be so sure. I believe I can sense something a little different about you in this phase. I believe others will sense it too, though likely only subconsciously.’

  Kate glanced around at the crowds, which were not thick on a Monday in June, but there were enough people that she noticed the looks which were coming their way. She was sure they were not all directed at her, Antonia was a stunning woman in her own right, but many were and they seemed more lustful in her direction. ‘Oh.’

  ‘As you say, it is abated since yesterday. I believe we have found a suitable palliative for your ailment.’

  ‘Most suitable,’ Kate agreed with a grin. She looked back to the tiger who had now stopped in his endless prowling to look at them. ‘His fur is so thick. It looks so soft.’

  ‘It is a little coarser close up.’

  ‘You’ve been that close to him?’

  ‘I was made a fellow of the Zoological Society which operates these gardens. I was able to examine him closely. I may be able to introduce you at some point, though not, I think, today.’

  ‘No, not today. Though I believe, if I may be so bold, that he prefers blondes.’ The tiger chose that moment to make a low growl. ‘See? He does.’

  ‘You, Katherine Felix, are a terrible tease. Come, we must away to the station for your guardian’s train is due in within the hour.’

  Richmond.

  Charles took a sip of his tea and sighed gratefully. ‘Somehow it is never the same on a train,’ he said. ‘Now, did your rather unconventional plan produce the desired results, Mrs Wooster? Kate looks less disturbed.’

  ‘It did, and she is,’ Antonia replied.

  ‘I am much eased,’ Kate agreed. ‘The urge is still with me, but much less so than before.’

  ‘And that is most likely a good thing given our visit to the zoo before meeting you,’ Antonia went on. ‘I believe old Raja might have climbed the bars had he met you yesterday.’

  Kate giggled. ‘Perhaps, but he could tell I would not have accepted his advances with equanimity.’

  Charles was managing to appear very embarrassed and intensely curious at the same time. ‘You could tell?’

  ‘I could… feel how he felt. It was not communication, but more of an awareness.’

  ‘Grieve always said you had a way with the horses. I believe you have something of an empathy for our fur-clad cousins, Kate.’

  ‘Fur!’ Kate burst out. ‘I meant to ask, and only do so in front of my guardian because he is a man of science and can take this as the technical question it is…’

  Charles prepared himself for overwhelming embarrassment and said, ‘Go on.’

  ‘Mister Thomas was endowed with… quite an amount of fur. In many places. I have, on one occasion, seen Charles’s chest and it is not as hairy. Is Mister Thomas unusual?’

  Antonia pointedly avoided looking at Charles’s reddening cheeks and said, ‘He is more hirsute than most. However, most men and women have more body hair than you do, Kate. It is my belief that your accelerated growth has resulted in this slight abnormality. It is nothing to worry on, however.’

  ‘But you don’t–’

  ‘Another habit I picked up in foreign climates. I utilise a straight-bladed razor for depilation.’

  ‘You do?’ Charles said, trying very hard to keep his voice steady.

  ‘I do. It is a technique which goes back to antiquity, Charles. The Ancient Egyptians would remove the hair on their bodies, and in many cases their heads, for the same reason I began to do it, hygiene. The hotter climes are prone to all manner of creatures detrimental to the health which find body hair a most suitable breeding ground.’

  ‘And Mister Wooster had no objection?’

  Antonia paused for a second, wondering whether to give a full or abbreviated answer. ‘No, he had no objection at all.’

  ‘Well, for hygiene, I suppose.’

  ‘Precisely.’

  ‘Another matter,’ Charles went on, a little more hastily than was necessary. ‘I believe it would be good for Kate to get away from Rhidorroch for a time. I admit that this also means I do not have to listen to my step-mother’s manufactured allegations further, but Mrs Morton believes her ready for polite society, we have a solution for her more “medical” issues at hand, and broadening her horizons will assist her in going forward.’

  ‘Wise indeed,’ Antonia agreed.

  ‘And so I have a favour to ask, Mrs Wooster. Were Kate to lodge with me, there would be tongues wagging within the week, and my house is not configured about the needs of a young lady. I would, of course, supply her with an allowance for purposes of maintaining her status such that there would be no inconvenience to you and your household other than her presence here, but I would ask that she be allowed to visit with you further to learn more of the ways of a gentlewoman and see more of our fine city.’

  Antonia glanced at Kate who was sitting with her hands in her lap and trying her best to appear inconspicuous. Tongues would wag if a young, single woman were lodged with an older, single man, that was for sure. If only they knew what she wished to do with Kate and did not by reason of proper breeding alone… Would that be enough? Well, it would have to be.

  ‘Of course she can stay, Charles. I would not have it any other way.’

  Counting Our Blessings

  Richmond, London, 28th July 1920.

  ‘No… This is wrong, Kate.’

  ‘But it’s the most natural thing in the world, Antonia.’

  Charles paused with his hand raised to knock on the drawing room door. Overhearing another’s conversation was hardly gentlemanly, but he could not quite believe what he was hearing.

  ‘No, it just… feels wrong.’

  ‘That is because you insist on wearing that silly corset whenever we do this. Take it off.’

  ‘O
h… Oh, all right.’

  Rather urgently, Charles rapped on the door and then pushed it open. Antonia’s hands were raised to her collar. Kate was fully dressed in the short kimono and loose trousers she wore for her taiji chuan exercises. Both were looking a little surprised to see Charles standing there, but then he had not announced that he would be coming.

  ‘Charles,’ Antonia said. ‘An unexpected pleasure. We were given to understand that you were travelling to Rhidorroch today.’

  ‘I had to change my plans,’ Charles replied. ‘What are you doing?’

  ‘Kate has been attempting, unsuccessfully, to teach me the breathing exercises Master Sun taught her. She believes it may assist me with my marksmanship.’

  ‘But,’ Kate went on, ‘I do not believe a corset, even one lightly laced, is conducive to proper breathing.’

  ‘Oh,’ Charles said. ‘Oh, well, yes. I believe my ward may be right, Mrs Wooster. However, I have both unpleasant news to impart and your assistance to request.’

  Antonia’s face straightened and she indicated a chair. ‘Please, Charles, sit and tell us what is wrong.’

  ‘I am a little too agitated to sit. Let me explain.’ He began to pace as Kate took a seat and waited for him to begin. ‘This morning Inspector Franklin of Scotland Yard came to my home requesting that I assist him in a matter of some urgency, which had still been kept from me for over a day. Alfred Cooper has vanished from his cell at Pentonville.’

  ‘What?!’ Antonia burst out.

  Kate was silent, too silent in Charles’s opinion, but he kept going because she had to hear all of it and he hoped she would be all right once he was done. ‘Franklin indicated that he may have had assistance and that there was evidence at the site which he felt I should give my attention to. I determined to request your aid, Mrs Wooster. Despite the unseemly nature of the environment, I believe your expertise in the matter of tracking may be useful and your senses are sharper than mine.’

  ‘W-why would someone help… help him escape?’ Kate got out, her brow knitted as she focussed on her words.

  Stopping his pacing, Charles moved to crouch beside his ward, taking her hands in his. ‘That, my dear, is what Inspector Franklin wishes me to discover. That and the means of his extrication, which I am told are unusual. We will discover his whereabouts and ensure that he is returned to his rightful place, Kate. Have no doubt. Now, breathe. Be calm. There is nothing for you to worry over.’

  ‘I w-will go with you. When calmed.’

  Charles peered at her, recognising the determination in her eyes. She was not going to be persuaded otherwise, certainly not in this state. ‘Just ease yourself.’ Antonia’s hand touched lightly against Kate’s cheek and the girl closed her eyes, pulling in a shuddering breath. Her fists clenched and then relaxed, and when she opened her eyes once again, they held the sharp intelligence Charles expected to see in them.

  ‘Are you quite sure you wish to expose yourself to Pentonville?’ he asked. ‘You are still in oestrus and–’

  ‘The last day,’ Kate stated, her voice now steady and clear, ‘and I have had my… therapy. I spent the first years of my life in a prison cell so there is nothing new to me there. Indeed, is Pentonville not the pride of the Prison Service for its progressive regimen?’

  Charles gave a disquieted grunt. ‘Would that that meant what it would appear to mean?’

  Pentonville Prison, Barnsbury.

  While the visiting of a prison cell by two comely women might have brought images to mind of men straining at the bars to reach them, there was none of that at Pentonville. The ‘separate system’ was employed there with each man occupying his own cell in solitary confinement. Five halls spread out from a central area such that the guards there could see into all the wings. Kate spotted the inherent flaw as soon as she started down the hall to the location of her father’s cell: they could see the cells from the core, but not the prisoners within them.

  Alfred Cooper had spent the last fourteen months in a room thirteen feet long, seven feet wide, and nine feet in height, with a bed and a loom for company. The prisoners worked at some task, weaving it appeared in Cooper’s case, from six in the morning to seven at night. It was all they had to do given that they were never allowed to communicate with their fellows. When out in the exercise yard, they wore special caps with peaks which forced them to look only at the ground. Kate found herself unable to feel sorry for the man who had imprisoned her for five years.

  ‘Are you sure ladies should be exposed to this place, sir?’ Franklin asked, again, from the doorway.

  Charles was staring at the hole in the wall at the far end of the room, his eyes wide, and it was Antonia who answered. ‘I assure you, Inspector, that I myself have lived in more squalid conditions. Miss Felix is intimately familiar with a cell far less decorous than this one, as you well know.’

  Kate gave a shudder and nodded. ‘I have, and I must thank you once again, Inspector, for being among those who rescued me.’

  ‘All in the line of duty, ma’am,’ Franklin replied. ‘Though I’ll say that the safe rescue of a young lady from the clutches of a mad man ranks highly in my list of achievements as a police officer.’

  Kate favoured him with a smile, but there was something trying to impinge upon her senses which she was not, yet, sure of. She turned to the gap in the wall to concentrate.

  ‘It would appear,’ Charles said, ‘that the masonry has been melted. The temperature required to achieve this boggles the mind. I admit I would have to seek aid or research the matter, but I would imagine something over two thousand degrees Fahrenheit would be required. Nothing was heard or seen?’

  ‘Nothing, sir,’ Franklin replied. ‘No one knew anything was wrong until they checked his cell in the morning.’

  Antonia was leaning out through the hole to look down on the ground two storeys below. ‘And then, unfortunately, they proceeded to obliterate any evidence of traffic outside. However… I see no signs of any path being made towards the wall from this locality.’ She pulled her head back in. ‘Inspector, I should like to examine the ground outside before we leave, to be sure. From here, I could believe that the man was spirited away on wings.’

  ‘Unlikely,’ Charles said, ‘but not entirely impossible. Kate? You are concentrating so hard I feel you must have noticed something?’

  ‘There’s a scent,’ Kate said. ‘Metallic, but combined with… with the scent of Mrs Bridger’s French bread.’ She turned and beamed at them, having successfully identified the smell.

  ‘Garlic?’ Antonia asked. ‘Mrs Bridger makes garlic bread as an appetiser sometimes. Perhaps the food…?’

  ‘I somehow doubt that garlic plays a great part in the ingredients of the food here, Mrs Wooster,’ Charles said.

  ‘No, perhaps not.’

  ‘Still, Inspector, it might be best to check with the warders regarding the last meal served here.’

  ‘Gruel, sir,’ Franklin replied without moving. ‘Supper is a pint of gruel and five ounces of bread.’

  ‘Ah. Well done, Inspector. I believe that is a fact I would choose to forget. However, metal and garlic. I believe I may have an idea, but it would be best to confirm it. Ladies, we must retire to the laboratory.’

  Knightsbridge.

  Kate had never seen Charles’s laboratory. There had been no need and some concerns that such a setting might provoke an atavistic episode, but she looked around it calmly, indeed with some interest. She remembered some of the trappings of her father’s lab, the cages, the benches, the restraints, and this was nothing like it.

  There were benches, certainly, but these were almost overflowing with instruments, papers, and books, and apparently partially finished devices of various kinds. Along the walls were shelves which held bottles and boxes, and more devices. Some of those even looked as though they were completed though what they were constructed to do was beyond her.

  Under the benches were cupboards and drawers, and from one of these Charles took a
stone slab perhaps a foot on each side and half an inch thick. He seemed to be struggling with it so Kate stepped over and took it from him, lifting it quite easily.

  ‘My apologies if I act in an unladylike manner,’ she said, ‘but we know I am stronger than you and there is no sense in your struggling.’

  ‘I believe my manhood can survive the indignity,’ he replied. ‘It is heavy, and for good reason. Please, on the bench, but then retire a distance. What I wish to show you is quite an energetic reaction.’

  Leaving Kate to place the stone, he began searching through the bottles on one of his shelves, finally discovering one made from brown glass with a firmly sealed stopper in the top. Opening it, he took a small spatula from the bench and used it to spoon a pea-sized blob of grey paste dripping thick oil from the jar and pressed it to the stone before resealing the bottle and putting it away again.

  That done he retrieved two sets of goggles with dark-tinted glass in them from another drawer, handing a set to Antonia. ‘Kate, you would be advised to put on your spectacles.’

  ‘Oh…’ Reaching into her purse, Kate found the little leather case he had given her and removed the round glasses. They too had dark glass in them, but they were normally employed merely to hide her eyes from public view. She could see perfectly well through them in daylight, even on a cloudy day, and it gave her greater anonymity. She had been delighted with them, but she suspected that in this case they were being suggested for a different purpose.

  ‘What exactly is that, Charles?’ Antonia asked. ‘And why is it coated in oil?’

  ‘It is a mixture of a number of materials, some of which react quite violently with air. Hence it is kept beneath an oil which stops the oxygen getting to it. However, to truly activate this, we will need a more energetic trigger.’

  He lit a Bunsen burner using a clever device which appeared to create sparks by rubbing metal across flint, and then used that flame to light a long taper. Holding it at arm’s length, he lowered the burning end towards the blob of grey goo. There was a fizzling noise as the oil evaporated and then…